This blog has been sitting in my head for several months now. Like all things, take it with a grain of salt, take your reaction/questions to the Word in prayer, and see what works for you! And if my "blog tone" ever seems teacher-y, it comes natural as a former middle school teacher!
Last year, when I started staying home full time, I was 100% overwhelmed. And I only had one child then. Jay was born in the middle of that school year. There are SO many things you feel like you should be on top of when, after all, you're
at home all day for goodness sake. As a working mom, I'd wondered what on earth I'd do with the whole day to ourselves. As a stay at home mom, I was overwhelmed at trying to be some kind of Susie Homemaker.
The Bible is clear on many things relating to being a wife, parenting, homekeeping, etc. I encourage you to search out things specific to your struggle. Many of my struggles came from worldly pressures; I felt like I needed to be all things at all times. When I broke down about this to Alex, I was able to hear his perspective, what he thought best suited our home, and what meant the most to him. We were able to prioritize our family's needs together and lower some expectations that were in my head. Then I gave my list to God asking Him to change my heart and attitude. I find myself still having to give that over
every day.
For example,
for us, a fancy dinner is not a blessing -- there's no typical time home for Alex and our family dinners are quick with little ones. So for me, I typically cook dinner 3 times a week. Sometimes more, sometimes less, and sometimes we eat soup/sandwiches or whatever we can get together. But that was a big stress for me each afternoon that Alex confirmed was not a big priority to him so I had to let go of the Susie Homemaker idea of a dinner -- that was time wasted in prep that didn't bless my family.
But that may be a priority to your man so you'll have to build in that prep time (night before, during nap, etc.).
I hesitate to share other things that we prioritized because this will look
so different for each family. The main thing is that
communication and
prayer set me free. I had been hard on myself about a lot of things, and it was GREAT to see that GO!
Same with running -- it has been so freeing to have something I only
have to do 3x a week. That is attainable in my life. 3x a week doesn't seem daunting -- it's not even the majority of the week. Many a prayer for self-control/discipline has been prayed for this!
And I don't iron one bit of my children's clothes. They all get stuffed in a car seat so who cares!? Just lay them out really nicely while still damp! :)
So I encourage you, especially in the world of blogs where it
appears everyone is some sort of Susie Homemaker/Martha Stewart, if you're feeling overwhelmed (like I can get with dinners, exercise, housework, etc.), communicate with your man, get some priorities down together, prayerfully seek out what the Word says, ask other mamas what they do, and try something one thing at a time.
I also think about what my "work-self" would say to me now. Like a few weeks ago when it was pouring when we woke up, I felt my insides start dreading a day trapped in the house. But I remembered how two years ago, I dreaded even more dropping K off on days like that, running in through the rain, being separated during a storm, etc. We pulled out every project, puzzle, and activity we could think of and had long day inside!
All of this to say,
no one is on top of
everything at
anytime. But everyone has strengths, and I love learning from others mistakes/successes. My pictures improved when I asked
April what settings she's using or
Ali what lens, my homekeeping improved when
Hill posted about her list, my cooking receives inspiration from
Sarah and
Emily (and
Scarlotte if she'd post more recipes!), my bread baking aspirations inspired by
Sarah Beth and
Rebekah, my home logistics helped by
Alyssa and
Sarah, my sewing friends (
Mandi,
Ashley,
Chris,
Ashleigh,
Maggie, etc.) constantly impress me (but I know I'm not taking up another hobby), my running received accountability when
Casey (right off of having baby #2) went from couch to half-marathon with me,
Tipi and
The Macs remind me He can get you through the toughest of times, my home decorating desire almost comes to life when I see
Emily's cute projects (almost but not yet), my blogging received a reminder to keep memories well
here, my patience was enhanced
here,
Katherine Wolf continuously shakes my life perspective with her recovery, the Loerkes inspired aspects of our marriage through
Tuesday Questions and their
re|engage talk,
Lots of Scotts posts are like devotionals in themselves, Ann Voskamp's
post on Guatamala was seared into my mind, and I could go on and on. Not to mention the loads of real life people I call/email to ask endless questions for all manner of discipline logistic, prayer life help, recipe advice, and so much other wisdom fellow mamas have to offer -- those that are there now
and those that have been there!
How grateful I am that I'm not expected to get things right or perfect. If I feel that way, I can be certain that is not a feeling from Him!
"He who began a good work in you
will carry it on to completion
until the day of Christ Jesus."
Philippians 1:6
"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free.
Stand firm, then, and
do not let yourselves be burdened
again by a yoke of slavery."
Galatians 5:1
"Listen to advice and accept instruction,
and in the end you will be wise.
Many are the plans of a man's heart,
but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails."
Proverbs 19:20-21
"Call to Me and I will answer you
and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know."
Jeremiah 33:3
"For I am the Lord, your God,
who takes hold of your right hand and says to you,
Do not fear; I will help you."
Isaiah 41:13
"Find out what pleases the Lord."
Ephesians 5:10
"Do not conform to the pattern of this world,
but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.
Then you will be able to test and approve what
God’s will is — His good, pleasing and perfect will."
Romans 12:2
"All the believers were one in heart and mind.
No one claimed that any of their possessions was their own,
but they shared everything they had."
Acts 4:32
"So be careful to do what the LORD your God has commanded you;
do not turn aside to the right or to the left."
Deuteronomy 5:32
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses,
let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles.
And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us,
fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.
For the joy set before Him He endured the cross, scorning its shame,
and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.
Consider Him who endured such opposition from sinners,
so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."
Hebrews 12:1-3